Life

Ah life is a little different for me now. I am in Arizona now. Living in Gilbert with three other dudes. I haven't had roomates for over a year and am getting used to it slowly but steadily. Luckily for me all three have proven to be cool guys. I have played tennis, gone to the movies and to a party with them. All in all I can't complain. Well I can, but only about the heat. 110 is a little hotter than I thought it would be.....116 is hotter than it should ever be anywhere....except in hell, it can be 116 there. But what makes it bearable is knowing that in January where it is snowing and cold and freezing in most places in the country I will be enjoying sunny and 75.
Also, I wasn't going to publicly share my weight loss goals but I am kind of proud of myself and thought I would share. Since my birthday in March I have lost .......drumroll....... 22 pounds. I was really terrified to jump back on the scale when I moved down here. When I moved to my parents house for the month of July I stopped weighing myself. And I also stopped running 10 miles a week. And I was taken out to eat so much that I really was so afraid to step back on the scale. Luckily for me I still managed to drop three pounds. How- I don't know. Now I am back on a pretty good diet and since being here have dropped another 2 pounds. So if I can finally get myself back on a solid exercise routine combined with this diet the next 30 pounds should hopefully be off before Christmas break. That is my goal. That would put me about ten pounds less than I was when I came home from my mission. I came home in really good shape. And I maintained that for like three months. Then slowly by slowly the pounds came creeping on. Then after a year and a half they came on a little faster until it kind of put me into a slight state of depression I was depressed that I let myself get this way and depressed that I was lacking the motivation to do anything about it. Then I sprained my ankle and then a few months later did it again. Each brought on bad eating and no exercise. Then came the holidays and finals and blah blah blah a lot of other excuses. Then my birthday hit and I began to analyze my life and what was making me a little blue. The largest answer was my weight. I didn't want to date because I didn't feel good about the way I looked. I felt like I had to compensate for the unattractive state I was in by being funny. Yeah I made myself the fat funny friend. Which in case you have never been this person is a depressing state to be in. Because when you don't feel in the mood to be funny you feel like you have let down the one thing that makes you valuable to a friendship or a group of people. I became kind of disconnected to a lot of people because I didn't know what else to do. Also people treat you much differently when you have extra lbs than when you don't. I have noticed it first hand. People care more about what you have to say, about you in general when you weigh less, and take you more seriously. Friends who are fit and good looking start making you plan B. It is sad. If I have ever done this to anyone I want to apologize now because it is one of the worst feelings in the world to watch people who you care about and who you know at one poing really cared about you treat you differently because of the way that you look.

So to make a long story short, I am tired of feeling blah and not good enough. So I began hitting the gym really hard and dieting. I have had a few setbacks of weight fluxuation but I am finally to a point where I don't feel like I can go back to where I was four months ago. So the next 30 lbs will put me just at the ideal weight for where I think I need to be. Just got to get my fitness and diet to work together.

As a side note, next post will be a top ten milf post. I am very excited. I hope you are too. Thanks for listening.